I’m having trouble describing my situation. As of this date I’ve recorded at least 9 lucid dreams, or so I think they are lucid dreams. The problem is that, my experiences while being lucid differ completely from the usual reports from all the other descriptions I’ve read about. Usually, when someone describes attaining lucidity in a dream, there’s an increase in vividness, everything becomes more clear and, of course, there’s the opportunity to do whatever it is one desires before the time of lucidity expires. Although one’s experience with lucidity can vary between one person and another, it’s safe to say they’re bound to show similarities. To me, none of this happens. All my “lucid dreams” behave very weird. Everything turns dark, to the point where I can’t see a thing, just pure and utter darkness. On top of that, I can’t even move an inch, let alone do anything worth noting! It’s as if there’s an invisible force preventing me from moving, my body completely paralyzed as I remain in this state for a couple of minutes before finally waking up.
Last night was no different. I woke up early and stayed like this for about half an hour, reading some articles about lucid dreaming before returning to bed. I then attempted to WILD, and had an interesting experience though very similar to the rest. I tackled the practice with what I’ve learned from my meditating sessions and thirty minutes in I lost notion of the waking world although still conserving a small sense of awareness, so as not to fully drift myself to sleep. I was in a sort of hibernating state, but fully aware of what was going on around me. Anyway, some ten to fifteen minutes went by and I began perceiving snippets of images, which later turned into short dream scenes. It was then that I became conscious of myself, a short spike in awareness which helped me realize “Hey, I’m finally in the dream!” And just as I became aware of the situation I was in, the whole thing fade to darkness. For a couple of seconds I remained calm, this was nothing new to me. I attempted moving my arm to no avail, the invisible force was already at its work. Then, I became conscious of my actual body asleep in bed, while observing the blackness through my eyes. After that I felt a strong vibrational pulse around my body, and a couple of seconds after that I opened my eyes to reality.
I woke up not feeling entirely angry about the result of my attempt. As a matter of fact, I was actually glad to have another “lucid dream” as a very long amount of time had passed since my last “success.” However, I’m still baffled as to what I can do to progress further and really experience what it means to be lucid in a dream. I mean, I begin to wonder, have I actually become lucid in any of these dreams? Do they even count as dreams? It appears to me that I’m being kicked out of them as soon as I get lucid, and I don’t know why this is happening. I’ve thought about voicing my intentions, but I can’t move an inch of my body, and willing mentally doesn’t seem to do the trick. Likewise, when attempting to move it feels as if I’m trying to move my actual sleeping body instead of my dream body.
Any ideas as to what I could do to solve this? Any input from you dreamers will be greatly appreciated.