Overcoming my fear?

[charmedone540]

Hi everyone.
I really hope that this is the right place to put my question!
(I’m really sorry if it’s not; after all, I am a newbie =] )

(LONG post)

Anyways, about 4 or 5 days ago I found out about lucid dreaming. Before then I had no idea such a thing even existed. I was in English and we were discussing different topics to do our research papers on since the topic could be anything. I had no idea what I was going to do my own paper on so I was listening to what other ideas people were shouting out. Somebody started talking about what their dreams meant and the different stages of dreaming. Eventually, someone thought it would be cool if we could ever control our dreams.
Immediately, I was really interested in the possibility of being able to control my dreams, so I went to a computer and started to type in “control your dreams/subconscious”. I came across a couple different websites talking about lucid dreaming, and then came across THIS site.
This site had SO much information about lucid dreaming. It got me really excited about how lucid dreaming is something that can really be achieved!
I thought it would be absolutely amazing to be able to control my dreams and do whatever I wanted since I’ve always wanted to control them but never knew it was possible. Usually, I can’t seem to control my body or anything and just have this feeling that I’m kind of there but not really (if that makes sense).

Anyways, I had already had a dream journal by my clock because about 1 month before I had my 1st teeth falling out dream and found it interesting. So I decided that whenever I would have a weird dream I would write it down and see what it meant.
Since I already had a dream journal I was all ready to go for my 1st night. I tried doing the mantra of “When I wake up, I will remember my dream” over and over again until I feel asleep. When I woke up in the morning, at first, it didn’t seem like I remembered anything, so I was a little disappointed. But while I was eating my cereal I all of a sudden started to remember my dream. Of course it was only 1 dream that I could remember and only little snippets out it, but still! I was very excited and couldn’t wait until the next night and start remembering more.

While I was at school that day, I went on the computer to look at more lucid dreaming websites and stuff. I’m a frequent Yahoo!Answer girl so for some reason I thought it would be fun to see what other people thought of lucid dreaming.
My 1st mistake.
At 1st everything was going fine. Then I stumbled on a question that said “What are lucid dreams like/how do they feel” or something like that. The answer that was chosen reply was “It was frighting. Gave me horrible nightmares. Don’t do it, you will go mad. Seriously”, or something to that extent.
At first, I was a little freaked out, but I just put it out of my mind and kept doing some more research.
Then I found another similiar question and this girl said she was lucid dreaming but then her sister turned into a demon or something and it was scary.
I started wondering myself if this could happen to me if I went lucid.
Could I possibly start being lucid, have a great time for a little bit, then have terrible creatures appear and scare me to death!? Could I be so scared because these creatures seemed so real that I would have a heart attack in real life!
I started worrying about these things a lot.
That night, I told myself not to be so silly and that as usual, I was being a hypochondriac (I usually can freak out about having health problems when I’m normally just fine lol). So, I did the mantra thing…but not as with much excitement or confidence or even desire as the 1st night.
As expected, I didn’t remember any of my dreams.

I know now that to achieve lucid dreaming it’s a mind over matter thing.
That even though my consciousness wanted to remember my dreams and eventually have lucid dreams, my subconsciousness was afraid and terrified of what I would find in my lucid dreams.

Don’t get me wrong! I REALLY want to have a lucid dream. But now I’m a little bit afraid of what will happen once I’m lucid…will creatures hurt me? Demons? Eerie/creepy stuff pop out of nowhere? Will I go mad/crazy?
Is this normal to feel this apprehensive for a beginner?

Please help me overcome my fear!

(sorry about the long post!! You are a sweetheart if you read this entire thing!!)

[moogle (mognet)]

where to start?
Well lucid dreams are just dreams in which you are aware and so can use free will and control. So if you aren’t afraid of normal dreams, there is even less reason to fear lucidity.

I would suggest reading the first lucid dream topic in the dream journal forum and some topics in adventures, this will remind you about why you were first interested in LDs

[AaBbCcDdEe]

Don’t worry. It’s just a dream. A dream where you can alter reality, but it’s still a dream. Lucid dreams are just as safe as regular dreams. I’ve NEVER heard of someone being harmed in real life because they were hurt or scared in a dream.

You could just wake up if you feel apprehensive anyway.

By the way…
to LD4All!

[charmedone540]

Thanks moogle, and Stevenscar.
I don’t know, I guess I just was scared and worried about what I would face in my lucid dream.
Is it funny that I just wanted everything to be happy and nice?

[Presence_of_Light]

sounds like propaganda

lucid dreaming is completely neutral,

“The only thing to fear is fear itself”

if you turn and confront your fear, it will tremble and crumble,
“Sometimes all of our thoughts are misleading”

firstly, love, respect, forgive everyone, secondly, stand up for yourself and create a positive reality by following your highest bliss and interests,
so in a LD with these rules, you will be fine.

“I am sorry, please forgive me, I love you, thank you.”

you can heal other people by thinking those above thoughts to them,
mean people, sad people, people that hurt you for no reason, if you say those thoughts to them in your mind, you can heal them literally.

[relV]

I can generally agree with all the replies, and I find some of tips you got quite helpful

A couple of things,
as moogle said, a lucid dream is just a dream…
So there’s no reason to fear, otherwise you simply won’t go to bed , will you ?
If anything, you will have a somewhat more conscious control over your dream, so the fear level in any case should be lower, however, some people do get nightmares as they are lucid, but it is because they were conditioned to, to avoid this, I suggest thinking only positive thoughts before going to bed and while falling asleep, and combined with the remember your dreams mantra, try to visualize /feel / sense/ think about how you want your dream to be, and how it will feel to be lucid in it.
With practice , you will find yourself able to create entire worlds in your dreams, to do whatever it is you want, and even wake up instantly.

With that being said,
I think you made a very good analysis by yourself of what was going on,
and that’s the most important thing.
For everything you might hear , read, or absorb in some other way is ok and nice and might shorten your way, but the actual learning is an inside process. It has to come from experience. there’s no other way. (that I know of)

I took interest in your saying about how you feel you’re there but not there.
I’d be happy if you could explain some more about it here , or through PMs.

As you said, you wanted to lucid dream but your subconscious mind was afraid of it.
That’s probably very accurate,
whatever the cause is, your subconscious mind didn’t want to lucid dream.
But don’t be confused into thinking your subconscious mind is some entity sitting in a corner of your brain, your subconscious mind is you, on a much deeper level.
The conscious mind is an analytical tool, it thinks and analyzes , whereas the subconscious never judges, analyzes or thinks, it only does.
Procrastination ?.. (conflicts between conscious and subconscious)
So to be a successful lucid dreamers , you have to modify your mental activity on a sub level, not a conscious level. All the methods, MILD, WBTB etc… are merely techniques to implant something on the subconscious mind. (not including WILD , FILD. Techniques in which you enter the dream world consciously)
The thing with MILD and the likings is that even if it does work, the subconscious is shortly dismissing the general idea getting you back to where you were in the first place. Through your general attitude and way of thinking , the subconscious mind is molded into being. That’s why keeping a positive, self confident approach on (everything) lucid dreaming is beneficial , even if you don’t have a lucid dream tonight.
Try to release your beliefs, expectations and fears as much and as fast as you can.
Flow with everything that comes your way, enjoy it, have fun with it.

Hope this helps,
if you have more questions, feel free to ask

[charmedone540]

@relV

I can generally agree with all the replies, and I find some of tips you got quite helpful

A couple of things,
as moogle said, a lucid dream is just a dream…
So there’s no reason to fear, otherwise you simply won’t go to bed , will you ?
If anything, you will have a somewhat more conscious control over your dream, so the fear level in any case should be lower, however, some people do get nightmares as they are lucid, but it is because they were conditioned to, to avoid this, I suggest thinking only positive thoughts before going to bed and while falling asleep, and combined with the remember your dreams mantra, try to visualize /feel / sense/ think about how you want your dream to be, and how it will feel to be lucid in it.
With practice , you will find yourself able to create entire worlds in your dreams, to do whatever it is you want, and even wake up instantly.

With that being said,
I think you made a very good analysis by yourself of what was going on,
and that’s the most important thing.
For everything you might hear , read, or absorb in some other way is ok and nice and might shorten your way, but the actual learning is an inside process. It has to come from experience. there’s no other way. (that I know of)

I took interest in your saying about how you feel you’re there but not there.
I’d be happy if you could explain some more about it here , or through PMs.

As you said, you wanted to lucid dream but your subconscious mind was afraid of it.
That’s probably very accurate,
whatever the cause is, your subconscious mind didn’t want to lucid dream.
But don’t be confused into thinking your subconscious mind is some entity sitting in a corner of your brain, your subconscious mind is you, on a much deeper level.
The conscious mind is an analytical tool, it thinks and analyzes , whereas the subconscious never judges, analyzes or thinks, it only does.
Procrastination ?.. (conflicts between conscious and subconscious)
So to be a successful lucid dreamers , you have to modify your mental activity on a sub level, not a conscious level. All the methods, MILD, WBTB etc… are merely techniques to implant something on the subconscious mind. (not including WILD , FILD. Techniques in which you enter the dream world consciously)
The thing with MILD and the likings is that even if it does work, the subconscious is shortly dismissing the general idea getting you back to where you were in the first place. Through your general attitude and way of thinking , the subconscious mind is molded into being. That’s why keeping a positive, self confident approach on (everything) lucid dreaming is beneficial , even if you don’t have a lucid dream tonight.
Try to release your beliefs, expectations and fears as much and as fast as you can.
Flow with everything that comes your way, enjoy it, have fun with it.

Hope this helps,
if you have more questions, feel free to ask

Wow! Awesome post relV!
Sorry if I seem rushed in my reply, but I have to get off the computer soon
The weird thing is, I never usually have that many nightmares. And if I do, I never remember them. So you would think that being concerned about nightmares would be silly for me because I never really have them. I’m a lot more relieved now with yours and everyone’s reply to my concern. I guess I get a lot more worried at night…I think I’m still a little afraid of the dark, lol, as childish as that sounds. I’m going to use your advice and think only positive things as I’m drifting off to sleep, which is actually what I used to do as a little kid. Whenever I was worried I might have a nightmare I’d remember this Disney Movie that I loved (and still do today) that worked and never had nightmares! I seemed to have forgotten about this method, as easy as it is!
Oh, and relV, I’m not positive but I think I got really excited about having my own lucid experience after I read a certain lucid dream you had. I remember being very envious and totally in awe at how amazing your lucid dream sounded. It actually kind of reminded me of the books/movies Narnia just because it sounded so magical. I really hope that someday I’ll get to have a lucid experience like that!

(thank you to everyone for the advice again! You guys are really sweet )

[relV]

If you are afraid of the dark, you can sleep with some light on ?..

But I have to point out that fears are the only thing we have to fear.
We must face our fears face to face, confront them, and overcome them.
That is the only way.
Our egos create whole worlds for us to experience in order to avoid dealing with our fears,
the ego is putting on a show, merely shoving the fear under the rug, for us to have a delusional feel good experience.
We must face our fears, not run away from them.

It’s nice to hear you enjoyed a dream of mine

You will be able to experience that and beyond. You are able to experience that and beyond.
Lucid Dreaming is just a tip of the iceberg of what you can experience.
There’s practically no limitations.
Start your engines

Do the things that give you pleasure. have fun

Trust your intuition.
Love yourself.

[almighty_catfish]

i’m kinda scared of the dark too. once i turn my light out i never open my eyes until i find the switch. but i overcome that once i get in bed (when i find it ) and start visualizing things i’d like to do in dreams, or events that have happened during the day. i just let my thoughts drift.

that might help you too but i think a small light would be a good idea too. i had one until it broke. actually i broke it.
uh… but what matters is that you should stay positive (like relV said) and not worry about nightmares because dreams are pleasant and fun 99% of the time anyway. think of it this way: when your life is happy, so will you in your dreams, and you can wake up happy because of that.
well that’s the way i see it.

[Presence_of_Light]

i like the dark b/c that’s where you can see all the pretty colors

i might write up a technique on how to see them soon,

[dreaminghamster]

Nightmares are actually what got me into lucid dreaming. I found out about it after a bad night researching how to prevent them.

All of the nightmares I ever have are lucid, but I never knew I could control them, so I would try to get out of it. After I found out about lucid dreaming I was able to end the nightmare part and have control over the dreams. Only problem being I soon stopped having nightmares, I have a LD every couple of weeks but those were always a guaranteed freebie.

[Lord_Antares]

charmedone540, u don’t have anything to be scared of.
if u are lucid and the nightmares appear, you will know it and won’t be affraid.
if a monster comes, just kick his ass. It’s your dream, who is he to bother you