Pessimism, a self imposed obstacle?

Quest for Lucidity
1

After ready countless topics with frustrated people threatening to quit LD forever, I noticed a common problem; looking at the glass half empty.

Pessimism is probably one of the greatest downfalls of beginning LDers, causing many people to stop themselves from acheiving their goals.

In order to solve this, people need to be aware that by having overly high expectations, their enthusiuasm about this new hobby will quickly fade.

I’ve seen people posting complaints about having LD’s that “don’t count” or “lasted a few seconds” but do not see these great achievements as progress. The fact that you realized you were dreaming at all was an accomplishment in itself, and you must believe that you can only progress forward. Never say “never”. Since LDing is a subconscious ability, being pessimistic during the learning process will only magnify your unsuccessfulness tenfold.

When I first had my LD I lost awareness very fast, and my abilities were next to nothing, but I still woke up feeling that I have accomplished a great and difficult task, because I knew that if I kept at it, the dreams would get longer and I would have more control over my surroundings; and they did.

Another big thing is jealousy. By reading all the posts about people who had an LD a day or two after discovering it, or about other people who have LD’s every day on command, it may encourage you to try even harder, but in many more cases it will cause your expectations to be too high. If it’s been much longer before your first LD than what other ld4all members have, then you may also feel frustrated and jealous that they were able to accomplish things before you.
Furthermore, once you begin to have LD’s that last long enough for you to try out some cool tricks, you may find that they don’t work, and get frustrated that it comes so naturally to everybody else.

LDing could be compared to a race. During a sprint, you have to look straight ahead, and not at the other contestants, as they will distract you from your goal. Even if you’re not as fast as them and they’re ahead of you, worrying about that fact will only cause you to get even farther behind.

As long as you keep comparing yourself to others, you will never be truly satisfied, because there will always be someone better than you.

So lighten up! “A thousand mile journey begins with one step.” No matter how small the step, you gotta start somewhere! I hoped this topic helped somewhat, until next time!

2

Nice theory, but I have probably the most pessimistic imagination on this site. I’m not talking about just LDing I’m talking about EVERYTHING.

Every single thing my imagination will go off on a negetive tangant showing me all the bad things that could happen. Every single thing.

The way I see it, that way when something bad happens you were expecting it, and when something good happens its even better because you wernt expecting it. So its not such a bad thing.

But I’ve never had a problem with LDing and I was pretty pessemistic about it when I first heard of it.

3

Being pessimistic will apply to pretty much anything, but it’s not enough just to tell someone to change. I’ve heard more than once that people have an “emotional setpoint,” which means being an optimist or a pessimist is based on your genetics. There isn’t a lot that some people can do in that case.

Hey, look on the bright side. At least I’m an optimist. :content:

4

:eek: Wow. Way to completely shoot down my article… Thanks… :neutral:

Well, i guess that could be argued. I agree that it is very difficult to change, and telling someone to change isn’t that much help if they’re truly set in their ways.
If you take me as an example, I used to be an “ultra pessimist” until I realized it was keeping me from enjoying things in life, and I was able to change, somehow.
I suppose this topic could be more geared to the people that are desperate for LD’s and are at or near the point of giving up.

5

amen to ham sandwhiche’s words. the fact is that we all have ego, and thus some of us will get upset about some things, jealous about others, happy towards some things, sad to others. and to complicate it, they’ll all change over time just to screw with us, heh.

My best way of dealing with it is simply collaboration with those who are actively/passively but positively persuing it. i tried for ages to give people ‘the power to change’ but i realised that was just me trying to give them the ‘power to change more like me’

People will always have gripes about something and get frustrated, it’s just natural. but it’s not worth your time getting upset. the only way you, as a person, can advance is to heed your own words, and stop looking at the contestants and keep sprinting forward :smile: that way you might suprise yourself and others - and that could be the positive fuel they need to change thier state of mind… :smile:

happy ld’ing :smile:

6

I guess I have a pessimistic view on LDing as some might already know. Still, I’d like to say though one thing that might bother me… its the assumed fact that everyone can have an LD. While that might be true, I’m sure that qualities such as vividity would probably be variable. It actually might depend on the dreamer’s brain itself. It might dictate just how good an LD is… and maybe even if you could even get an LD. (One can assume that not all people can get LDs… I don’t think its ever been established as unshakeable fact that LDing can be done by anyone.)

Given this… it might actually be negative to keep hoping for good LDs because there might be a chance that you’ll never get it… and so you just try and try and try, achieving nothing in the end. Pessimism might actually be a good thing. It keeps you practical. And you start to see if its worth it. The choice then ends with you.

7

You do make a point, but i believe that the difference between peoples’ brains will only change the way they experience a dream to a certain extent, discounting the people with mental disabilities. Even if there was such a thing as being “LD deficient” then there could always be ways to work around that, such as practicing visualization and meditation, and intense dream journalism.

But the way I look at it; since everybody dreams, (though we may not remember them) everybody theoretically has the opportunity to take up LDing.

8

Quite an useful post, IMO.

Yeah, I’ve already known that (or so I guess), but it’s still a very important thing.
Unfortunately (about LDing) I’m kinda a pessimst too.
Well, at least I have some persistence here. :happy:

Plus, I have already had one of those “few second” LDs…

9

Yeah I know what you mean…My first LD lasted about 4-5 seconds…I mean…I don’t know how the hell I realized I was dreaming and very suddenly it all became black and woke up…
But I wasn’t dissapointed about that…I was very impressed…because it WAS a LD, only a short one xD