I wish to share something, that is somewhat sacred to myself. Why I’m sharing this, I don’t know. There aren’t many who know about this, and I guess I’m kindof breaking the silent rule by doing this. I only hope that the outcome doesn’t turn out for the worse.
On july 13th, of 2006, I had the most meaningful, vivid, and somewhat most overwhelming dream I have ever experienced. I am not sure who I was in this dream. Whether I was myself, or someone else, I don’t know. I have mixed feelings about lucidity. I believe I knew I was dreaming, but I did not control the actions of my character. it was more like I was experiencing and seeing the world around them through their eyes.
Dream: Long Read.
[spoiler]The dream starts during the night. It’s raining lightly, and im outside. All I remember is that a car drove by, in the area that I was, and I took cover to prevent being seen. I was searching the area for something, but at the time I didn’t know what. It was around a building, a small store, i think it was an antique shop. I broke into it, and searched in and out of everything, bent on finding something very specific. Then I found it. It was a key. I took the key, and left the building. Sneaking through the darkness to avoid being seen. I came to a sewer lid, pulled it open, and climbed down into it. I traveled a short while before coming to a strange ring, which looked like it was a glass mirror, though it wasn’t reflective, nor transparent. Without stopping, i just kept towards it, and walked through it. On the other side was the exit of the tunnel I was now in, which turned out to be a large pipe. The end of the pipe extruded a couple feet out of the cliff side of a hill. The ground wasn’t far, so i climbed down to hand on the bottom of the pipe and dropped myself to the ground. At this point, I realized it was mid day. The temperature had changed, and the entire atmosphere was rather calming. After walking a distance, I don’t specifically remember which way, or how I got there, I came to an elevator. It was between 2 steep hills on both sides, and I approached from a path between them. I entered the elevator and it went up, far into the sky. When I exited the elevator, I was ontop of a very large disk shaped platform. The sky had few clouds, but there were clouds all around and below. The floar of the platform was a very smooth solid white material, similar to marble, but it wasn’t reflective. On the outer edge of the platform were light green rings, which were obviously there as rails. I walked across the platform and onto a catwalk. Across the catwalk, was another platform like the one I had entered onto. There was another elevator, but it was part of a large lightly hued dull yellow structure. I had to use the key in order to get in. When I was inside, the elevator moved, but I couldn’t feel which way it was going. It then stopped and opened into a long hallway. It was quiet, and the lights were off. I was quick to realize that I was in a hospital. Upon exiting the elevator, I again went into a cautious lurking behavior. I was sneaking around, looking through windows. Looking for something, but again I didn’t know what. But then I was startled by something, and I started running. I was being pursued by what I would guess was security. I knew I wasn’t supposed to be there. I ran and took a few turns, and as I was running down a hallway, my eyes focused on a specific wooden door that I ran to, and opened. I swung myself inside, closed and locked the door behind me. I was inside a room that looked like a viewing room into another. There were steps to the floar, similar to that of a theater. Banging started coming from the other side of the door. Muffled yells, and struggles to get in. Then I turned to the window and looked inside. It was a hospital bedroom. The entire room was white, and in the center was a hospital bed with someone in it. As soon as I saw who it was, an overwhelming feeling came over me. I knew who I was looking at. I placed my hand on the window, with a very strong feeling of longing. There was a girl lying in that bed. Asleep, in a coma. She had long well taken care of blonde hair, although her hair was not typically different tints of yellow, it all seemed to have a very low spectrum range of yellow, only shaded by the lights themselves. Her age was difficult to understand. She looked as though she could have been around the age of 10 or 11, but she had an aura about her that made it seem that she was much… much older… This girl that was lying in the hospital bed was me. I was looking through this glass window, into a hospital room at myself in a coma. All the sounds of the struggles, and even my heavy breathing seemed to subside as I stared into that room. Whoever’s eyes I was looking through, had some connection to me. They knew who i was, and they knew from the beginning what they were doing. What they were looking for. After a few seconds, the door burst open, and i turned to look. At that moment I woke up instantly.
I was completely awake, but i was flooded with an emotion that I can’t describe. Some sense of emptiness, sadness. I felt more alone than I ever had, but at the same time, I felt very serene. Calm, relaxed. I couldn’t change that feeling all day long. Nothing changed it. I felt like I was someone else. Like the girl in that dream had a very content worryless personality. Regardless of the tranquilizing emotions, even the sadness, I felt some kind of happiness. I felt no anger or frustration, and it felt as though they just simply didn’t exist in my being. My mind was clear. I had crystal clarity the entire day, which I had never, as long as I can remember, had before…
That night I went to sleep, and woke up the next morning without remembering anything that I may have dreamed, and everything about me was back to normal. My mind was again experiencing the same noise as usual, and my personalities a tangled mess.
I’ve been typical of myself from then on out, as I had been before the dream. Never again to feel those emotions, or clarity in my mind.
I have some answers now to the bundle of questions I had about this occurrence. But not all of them. And definately not material.
Before that dream, and even after, life had and always has felt wrong somehow.
I know why this is. I have some answers, but in knowing curtain things brings pain. Curtain understandings that regardless of what you wish, or how hard you try, you cannot help the situation. You can’t seek help from others for obvious reasons, such as simply their inability to do so. It doesn’t concern them, and there is no reason for others to be involved. It brings a sense of loneliness, and isolation.[/spoiler]
I don’t know if i post this in order for answers or not. I guess really I just wish to hear other’s views of this.
Aside from the obvious overall unique experience, in relation to dream happenings, I have never heard anyone mention of encountering themselves in their dreams. Ontop of that, I have never had any other dream where I saw someone sleeping. I havn’t really asked about that at any point, so i don’t know if that’s unique or not.
Anyways… That is that.
If this is the wrong place for this, I’m sorry. I just couldn’t figure out where else to put it.