[Need help] I cannot remember most of my dreams at all.

Hello LD4all, I am new to your community and come in search of answers and help. I am not exactly new to the concept of lucid dreaming, but it is only recently that I’ve been looking into trying it for myself. I’ve read a pretty good deal on this matter, but it seems my problems begin as early as remembering dreams and keeping a dream journal.

Now, I have looked around for similar threads on this forum but I couldn’t seem to find any that matches my case exactly. Still, apologies if I’ve missed it, and apologies in advance if this post should ramble on.

So what exactly is my issue? Well, quite simply, it is almost as if I don’t dream at all, on most nights. And I know what you might be thinking, “oh that’s what most people say, in reality you just can’t remember most of it”. That very well may be the case. However, even waking up with the express intention of “I’m going to remember what I dreamt last night, go!” nothing comes up. Nothing at all. Blank. Some people might say “oh I was with these people I don’t really know and we were in this vague place and that’s about it”. Me? I got nothing, no image, no picture, no sound, no sort of information or idea or anything really.

And it’s quite strange, because the dreams that I do have, I am fairly aware of during them, and also in the morning upon waking up I can remember at least some vague images or events. But I’ll get to those in a bit.

So essentially, the vast majority of my sleep, if I had to give a ballpark estimation I’d say maybe 70-75%, essentially feels like a being passed out or in a coma. It really does, between not being aware of any sort of “dreaming” and not remembering even the tiniest, most general thing. It’s like I go to bed, and my thoughts slowly fade into nothingness. It’s just… void. And then I wake up and life resumes normally.

So what about the dreams I am aware of, and can sort of remember? Well, it seems I have absolutely no control whatsoever during them. At any point, really. They almost always feel as though I’m watching a movie, half-paying attention, from a distance. This “distance” is key because even though I don’t really see myself from a 3rd person outside perspective, I don’t feel at all connected with the “character” that’s supposed to be myself, and I can’t control what I’m supposedly doing during these dreams. Which is why it’s just a little bit frustrating to read about such things as reality checks (which don’t get me wrong, make perfect sense), so I go “Well bloody hell, how am I supposed to look at my palm or pinch my nose or whatever when I can’t even control where I’m bloody looking at or really anything else about my supposed body in these dreams?”

Beyond that, it’s also quite frustrating to see obvious tells like clocks showing weird symbols or text changing in real-time or falling off a page or people shapeshifting under my eyes, but me somehow not realizing that that’s not normal and that I’m dreaming. Even though it becomes blindingly obvious the very moment I wake up and remember these sequences of events.

So that’s basically it, the vast majority of my dreams might as well not exist for all I can tell, and those that I am aware of, I have absolutely no control over, to any degree, at any point, almost ever. (exceptions are extremely few and far between and I can’t bloody figure out how to make them happen)

Thank you for reading and I look forward to reading your insight on this, hopefully this lovely community will help me overcome or at least better understand this problem that I’m facing.


Hi Jess,

You have basically just described exactly the way I’m feeling at the moment.

Here is my “venting” thread, where I touch on some similar frustrations.


I too feel totally disconnected. I’ve only been at this for a week ish, i’ve been doing my RC, trying to establish my “lucid mindset”, but when I dream it feels exactly as you have described. I don’t remember dreams straight away, I usually get up with the kids and then start doing things, really bitterly disappointed that I can;t remember if I dreamt or not, then BAM! a dream memory will come flooding back, i’ll think, how on EARTH could I not recognise the signs in that dream, as some of the things that happen are so preposterous, as to not do a reality check, or come to some kind of awareness.

The moment I remember fragments of a dream, I hold the image in my head for as long as possible. Jumping up and writing in a dream journal is just not possible for me. I have to get up to the kids and see to them first. But later, when I get a minute, ill jot down what I remember in my DJ. i think it helps not only to write it down, but to focus on what you remember and try to extrapolate more information.

For example, last night I had a pretty elaborate dream about my friend attacking me! That’s all I could remember at first. So I try to think of cue’s that will prompt more memory to come back… Like, how did I feel when my friend attacked me, then I use the feeling as a trigger, I felt angry and upset, from that I remember i told my dad I felt angry and upset in my dream, which triggered a memory that I was in my dads house! But how did I get there, i just appeared there after I was in school… wait, I WAS in school? BAM more memory comes back…

Sometimes this doesn’t happen, and if it does the process happens very quickly, visually, in my head, rather than me talking myself through it. Sometimes though, it doesn’t happen and I get very very frustrated, and sometimes wake with a headache from trying too hard.

I try all kinds of techniques before I go to bed, and when I wake in the night. Only once have I come to the realisation that I was in a dream, but even then it seemed like a normal dream. i think this may be the key for me. I woke in my bed. I EXPECTED to wake in bed, this gave me awareness that I should be conscious. Then, from that point, i noticed the wardrobe was upside down. This prompted me to think I was in a dream, but for some reason, I just fell asleep, I think I got excited trying all the things i’ve heard on here. This is the one and only time this has happened. All the other times, my dream self does not even entertain the notion that I could be dreaming, in fact, it just feels like a disconnected mess, a re-run, or a film im watching (ish).

So, for me, i’m going to focus on DILD techniques while trying to imagine waking up in my bedroom, I think this will give me the slight bit of awareness to then say, I might be dreaming.

If you want, keep this thread going and we can exchange experiences and notes and things because we seem to be at the same stage in our quest. Team up? :smile: :help:

I have been keeping a DJ for two years and due to several reasons there has been nights that I don’t recall anything. Even this week I had no recall on monday morning. Most common reason for low recall is that I haven’t gotten enough sleep. I sleep more and perform WBTB.

I think waking up from NREM causes you to not recall even a fading fragment when you wake up, but I can’t confirm this since I haven’t studied the subject. (Would be cool to work in a sleep lab etc.)

Hi Letaali,

Interesting to see you have kept a DJ for so long!? I’m impressed at your dedication. How are your LD exploits coming along? how did you get started? I assume you have had a LD by now having been at it for that length of time? how did you get to the point of your first LD and how did it feel?

I don’t want to derail this thread of course, stay on target! :peek:

My dream recall is still quite poor, I agree with you about not getting enough sleep. I went to bed a bit later than usual last night (I think I got to sleep about midnight, as opposed to 10, 10:30). My main problem is recall, coupled with low self awareness, as I explained above, my DS (and jess i think has this problem judging on what she said), just does not even want to entertain the fact I am dreaming.

So yes, more sleep = better dream recall for me. It’s the weirdest feeling i the world to have a dream memory surge in from nowhere…

Yeah, it’s a great feeling to suddenly recall a dream :tongue: Awareness is important in LDing. I try to focus on all my senses more every now and then. I also do SSILD every now and then, during WBTB.

To answer your questions about me:

As my profile says 31 LDs so far. I saw a youtube video explaining lucid dreaming 3 years and one month ago. I had spontaneous lucid dreams as a kid so I knew I could do it. I found a subreddit for lucid dreaming /r/luciddreaming and that site had links to guides. I started with reality checking first. I didn’t even do the finger RC correctly, I just looked at my fingers without counting them. I also did the clock RC.

Week later I was drunk in a dream, looking for my car. A DC in the form of Dr.Phil showed up and shoved his hand in my face yelling “DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS??!!” and I became lucid, but seeing a very detailed angry Dr.Phil right in front of me made me wake up.

That was near the end of 2011, I spent the whole 2012 in army and didn’t practice LDing much. Near the end of it I suddenly had a dream of being in the army and I recalled that I’m home in waking life. I became lucid but I had no idea how to stabilize a dream. It broke apart fairly fast. Then army ended and in January 2013 I started a paper DJ I still write in, it has a few pages left. 8 months I wrote down my crazy dreams without becoming lucid or even near. Then I had an amazing lucid dream that started in an empty dreamspace I call void. I saw a dream form around me for the first time in my life and I managed to teleport outside to see the stars.

I woke up feeling incredibly happy that I had success after trying for 8 months. I went to tell my dad about it and he basically told me I was lying and one can’t lucid dream. I needed a place to share my excitement and I joined ld4all. I was happy for several days after having that lucid dream. It felt like I had gotten a small visit into a temple that was in it’s own realm/universe inside my head. I wanted to go back and I’ve been practicing ever since.

This is exactly why i’m trying so hard to get lucid. It seems like mecca for me. I’ll keep on trying. :help:

This may help too

dreamviews.com/induction-tec … wild-secre ts.html

Disclaimer: I love this forum too.