I’ve had two shared dreams in my life so far with two different people. I find it frustrating that I am unable to prove this to anyone who hasn’t had the experience, but at the same time I can understand their skepticism. There’s no doubt that a scientific study of this phenomena would yield some intriguing results, but I have some theories as to why this would be a difficult study to set up:
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Shared dreams cannot be planned. Whether the subjects are lucid or not, this kind of dream only occurs when there is an “important” message lurking in the unconscious of both parties.
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A specific set of conditions - perhaps environmental, psychological, chronological or otherwise - needs to be met before a shared dream can take place.
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The two (or more) subjects must have a strong emotional bond, either with each other or with a mutual friend/relative.
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Shared dreams do not necessarily take place at the same time. Subject A could have a dream involving subject B, but subject B may not have the same dream until the next evening.
Obviously these are only theories based on my own experiences and those of the few shared-dreamers I have managed to speak with. If someone can devise a study that could deal with these factors (or even disprove them), I’d love to hear about it. I think it’s important to keep an open mind about the issue in the meantime.