“Are you some kind of Flapperjackle?” Gets randomly hit in the head with soda can
“Bazookers that was painful in a fun way”
^True Story^
Last night I was in a LD and there was a guy sitting in front of me. I wanted to talk to DCs and figure out what they represent and stuff.
me: Hi… How are you?
him: Fine…
me: So, what do you mean?
him: smirks It’s a long story that has a LOT to do with spider monkeys.
I was so confused by what he meant, I woke up because I was not focusing on the dream.(Before the dream I knew basically nothing about spider monkeys, just vaguely that they existed.) I’m still quite confused… I think I might just be messing with myself…
I had one very early in my sleep cycle. I was in a dark room with a projector screen, like a small theater full of news reporters and analysts. We were watching live footage of a foreign war, and every time an explosion happened on the screen, the room shook. I said aloud,
“how is the buidling shaking?”
DC newsman “what do you mean?”
Me: “last time I checked, I lived in America!” (I said somewhat smart-arse-edly). “How is the building shaking from the bombs exploding in a completely different country?”
DC newsman nods very knowingly while stating: “Sound structural integrity.”
That’s uh… Kinda contradictory, no?
Last night, this waitress got really annoyed at me for asking her when our food would be ready. I can’t remember exactly what she said, but it was something about how we wouldn’t get our food while we were still on the first floor.
I’m pretty sure the first floor was the ONLY floor, though.
I had a dream where there was a sign in a library that told people who were in groups to sit on wet chairs.
A few days later I was watching a play in a dream. An actor came on stage and said “do not, do not”. Then my friend came on stage and said “I grew up in microwave with a pretender.”
At one point in a dream a teacher at school announced in a dream that the parent-teacher committee would be having 40 meetings a year, and each would last a minute long.
I’m gonna be trying harder from now on to remember word for word the things my DCs say.
I was riding a bike around an empty underground parking garage when I see a friend of mine crawling around on all fours completely naked and barking like a dog. I laugh so intensely as if it’s the funniest thing I’ll ever see in my entire life. Unoffended, he pauses, looks at me, shrugs his shoulders and says “Well, this is the way it is.” and goes on barking.
Today I got, “Man, the internet connection on Mars really sucks, because there’s a 6 minute delay just to download something!” when talking to someone.
Beautiful, and, in fact, theoretically true 
Awesome 
Last night a DC said something not particularly strange, but there were some really weird names, so I guess I’ll share them here.
First was “Selbja” (or maybe “Serbja”). The man pointed at a small black and white picture of a boy and called it this weird name. Then the boy in the picture blinked 
Then he showed some weird alien like girls in a magazine and called them “Groleygo”. He repeated this word 2 or 3 times.
I didn’t find any meaning for these words in google…
-I once(many years ago) dreamt I was inside this machine with Link, Mario and a teddy bear. The teddy bear jumped on the conveyor belt inside, got pressed down by some stamp, and said “stamping is just a natural part of life”.
-In another dream, I saw Captain Falcon hanging from a cliff, and then random voices from somewhere else (I never saw them, just disembodied voices) started singing “Spiderman climbs on the wall, Spiderman climbs in the hall!”
-A young boy was talking to his father (both DCs) about playing as a pirate, then the dad said “well, you’ll have to be a nice little pirate, or else you have to walk the plank”
Recently a DC told me (jokingly) that viagra is like kryptonite to Mr Fantastic 
In a dream last night, Zelda said that coffee tastes better with cocaine in it. o.O
Odd because a few months ago i was messing around and flew down to a random person and yelled “HOW MANY CHICKENS CAN FIT IN THE SUN” (what was i thinking?) and anyways he replied “purple because aliens dont wear hats” whitch actually meant something that i found out about a week or so later, (i can tell the future :O)
I walked with an elderly man, grey hair, looked like an actor into a house what looks like a theater. I said to him bitterness, jeopardy or lost love. He turns around and smiled to me and said parlement.
I meet a young dream girl in a sportschool and asked her name. To ask for her in a next lucid dream. She said to me Jamamididan.
In an LD a while back:
Me: “Mom, guess what? You’re not real!”
Mom: “Of course I am!”
Me: “But I’m dreaming!”
Mom: “Then do a reality check!”
does RC
Me: “I’m dreaming!”
Mom: “No- then you’re doing it wrong. See the way to check is to ask yourself if there’s a rainbow 2 miles away and if everything is tinted red and green and white. If so you’re dreaming.”
Me: 
“whaa?”
That’s hilarious! 
My turn:
“I wonder if there’s a KFC around here…”
There’s probably some more crazy one’s lurking in my DJ somewhere. This one is just the one that came to mind immediately when I read the thread title.
Random old lady: “Goodbye, humans. I’m the president’s own woman.”
rofl XD
I was exploring my dreamscape (I was lucid), when I found a canyon. There was a river of lava in its depths. Then, I found an old man watching steadily the river. I asked:
Me: Sir, what are you doing?
Old Man: I’m watching my house.
Me: House? I’m seeing no house…
Old Man: But it’s right there!
Me: Really? How do you enter in it?
Old Man: It’s easy!
*Old man jumps in the river of lava
Seriously, I think I’ve never laughed so much within a dream. 
Talking about a movie with my DC father he says “It’s like having a big paper bullet in front of you, you know what’s going to happen.”
EDIT: DC woman: “Do you know how to put a coin in a “fumija”?”
(I asked her and fumija is a kind of milk/juice)
There should be a topic for dream made up words 