Being a lucid dreamer and being interested in dreams has always made me feel a little unconventional and eccentric (I’ve happily embrace that now), because not many people I know seem to appreciate dreams.
When I used to try to talk to my friends about it, they might have had a little interest in dreams for a while, but soon stopped trying to get lucid and conversations of dreams stopped along with it. Since then I (met Carol and) started interpreting my dreams and began to feel really reserved about sharing them, as if sharing my dreams felt like something spiritual or sacred.
So, Do you talk about dreams with your family or friends? Acquaintances? Strangers? What makes you comfortable doing that and how do people respond?
It’s exceptionally rare for me to talk about my dreams with people. The only people I feel comfortable talking about (my) dreams with are those who have reached the highest level of friendship, or, apparently, other lucid dreamers and strangers I meet online.
I think my fiance feigns interest when I tell her about my dreams or talk about lucid dreaming. That’s really the only person I can think of that I tell about my dreams. If I ever get really good at this I’ll just start a youtube channel and maybe 20 or 30 people will listen.
This is a very interesting topic for discussion. I can absolutely understand what you are saying and relate to how you are feeling for the most part.
When I started to get into this and long before I even had my first lucid dreams, I introduced my friends to the topic of dreaming and lucid dreaming in particular. I was a schoolboy back then and very excited about this discovery. Although they listened to what I said and respected my new hobby, they were not particular interested in it themselves. One of them signed up to join wolfgame however and become an addict
About one year ago however, I find a bunch of whatsapp messages from my best friend waiting for me when I wake up in the morning. They were something like “omg I got to tell you this because I know you’ll understand, I just had my first lucid dream and what a blast was this“. Turned out he tried it a bit again by himself and was successful. So since then it’s a topic we talked about a little, but he got too busy recently.
When I started out I also told my parents about it, but I think it’s a fair assessment to say that they don’t understand lucid dreaming at all and also not why this discovery also greatly elevated the importance of normal dreams for me. An assessment whose fairness I’m not so confident about is that they did not even spend an effort to try to understand. “Are you still writing down your dreams?“ is a question I get every other year or when they spot my DJ when I’m on a visit, but sometimes it feels like it is accompanied by a frown.
My current girlfriend, my previous girlfriend and the people I mostly hang out with these days have an almost hostile attitude towards dreams, it’s a cultural thing. My ex-ex-girlfriend was a dreamer herself though, so that was smooth. We always told each other of our dreams after waking up.
Nowadays I still tell my girlfriend if she played a significant role in a dream or if a dream was very important to me, but I can’t say she cares very much. I also sometimes tell other people of individual dreams that they played a part in or that is related to them somehow, e.g. if I have a funny dream about a project we are doing together. But it’s like sharing a story for the sake of conversation or small talk, it never goes deep.
I am lucky that my girlfriend engages with me about dreams. I tried to get her into lucid dreaming, but the lifestyle doesn’t work for her. However, she is interested in my dreams (or atleast acts like it) and tells me about her dreams when she remembers them.
You say they’re the only person you tell about your dreams, why is that?
Oooh, I might veer a little off topic here, but if you want to start a youtube channel about dreams, I wouldn’t let your experience stop you! I listened to a podcast called Lucid or Bust, which was narrated by someone who was trying to get their first lucid dream, and honestly listening to their journey to progress was probably more fun than if they had been an experienced or skilled lucid dreamer.
I feel that. My discovery of lucid dreaming was met with so much excitement. It’s like finding out magic is real and that anyone can do it! I thought it was too amazing to be true, even, but a strike of beginner’s luck gave my my first lucid dream that night.
I was so excited to tell my friend like, “yesterday I discovered magic exists and I DID IT! And so can you!”
I pushed two friends to try it at that time, but to my knowledge (even after having a lucid dream or two), neither of them stuck with it.
This makes my heart hurt. Why the disapproval and hostile attitudes?
I’ve never talked about my dreams with my family members. In some ways I feel like it’s put distance in my relationship with my sister, like I don’t trust her enough to tell her about my dreams?
Sad to hear that your girlfriend doesn’t care
I have before, on occasion, told someone about a dream of mine they were in to test and see how they handle conversations about dreams; that way the conversation is about them in some regard, they’re more likely to engage ahah.
Although, same experience, it’s rarely gone deeper.
I did have a friend tell me they’ve never remembered a pleasant dream, all they have is stressful dreams. I should have probably burst out right then, “Let me help you help yourself! You have the power to change that!” but I hesitated and the opportunity closed.
I notice recently there’s been a…trend? In being into the occult? Like people are into the aesthetic of spirits and star signs and witchy stuff suddenly?
Maybe it’ll bring more attention to dreams culturally.
You made me spill the beans
I told my teacher and did whole slides on it, the next thing you know, my teachers get interested, high school, and they put a presentation on it saying Lucid Dreaming In Class
I don’t know, dreams don’t normally come up in my normal conversations. With covid and all I don’t have a reason to get out and talk to people much.
As for the YouTube thing, I might. It sounds like fun but at the same time I have a million excuses not to do it even though I’d enjoy it.
I found that many people believe dreams are bad and they prevent having proper rest at night. When I tell them that they dream anyway, they just don’t remember them, they blatantly ignore my argument usually. Ignorance is bliss seems to be the tactic. More and more I notice a pattern in society in general that inconvenient truths or opinions that go against one’s own are dismissed without discussion. Well, it’s their loss really. The good thing about dreaming is that it’s a hobby you can pursue solitarily.
Then there’s the point that also came up already that it gets linked to the occult or considered crazy and impossible like magic and some extreme forms of spiritualism. I can’t really blame them anyway because it sounds too good to be true, to be aware in your dreams. But then again, it was scientifically proven…
On the bright side, if somebody ever has a lucid dream by themselves, all the doubt is usually erased as the experience itself is ultra convincing. Like with my friend in the story of my first post. He wasn’t a sceptic, he actively pursued to have a lucid dream. But still it was obvious what impact his first LD on him and his attitude towards the subject.
Wait, what? I’m a little confused aha. Are you saying you prepared a presentation about lucid dreaming and you had to share it with the class?
Ough that is true. At least we can still dream while COVID is happening.
If you decide to start a YouTube channel, shoot me a PM and let me know! I’d definitely listen in. Lucid dreaming is a niche interest and I definitely feel like a lot of ways you could utilize a channel beyond the few that exist now that mostly just focus on how to get lucid.
Whoa! I have not heard that one before. I could see how someone might believe that though.
I can never decide if I like or dislike that dreams are associated with the occult. Part of me is happy they’re seen that way because some dreams can feel and be really spiritual to a lot of people, including myself, but in the same breath I wish they weren’t just brushed off by people who don’t believe the occult. Because, as you said, there’s science behind lucid dreams too!
I’m pretty strongly in favor of not having them associated with the occult or with ideas like taking substances, which is all too common
I do agree with you though that I also try to view the strangeness of this hobby in a positive light. If not a lot of people are doing it, then it feels more special, exclusive and even a little elitist 8)
