Funny quotes, situations and powers in dreams

[Xgamer4]

The bottom line in a sig tells mine.
“Two dogs caught a Celebi then it was Armageddon.”

The only line I remember from a song I had to sing in a dream of mine.

FYI: Celebi is a pokemon. Here’s a pic of it:

[chambered_nautilus]

Oh la la… I have so many of these, here’s a few for you All completely unrelated to each other, of course.

I go off down the hall, and suddenly come across an interesting person. It’s my mom - but she’s dressed in a long, fluffy, sparkly red-and-gold dress, and she’s wearing a red-and-gold turban, and she has pointy wooden shoes painted red and gold. She’s walking funny, shuffling along on the heels of her shoes. I laugh. “You look crazy!” I say, then go about my business.

“Something’s wrong,” I think, and open my eyes. I’m not in the ceiling at all - it seems that instead of flying, I only managed to make myself sink into the bed. And I’m all twisted and jumbled up - there’s a leg sticking up out of the bed near my right ear. I wonder which leg it is. I wiggle my left foot, and the foor near my right ear wiggles. It must be that one.

I leave, and discover that I’m wearing pants made out of a giant rubber sandwich. It’s like a dog toy. Whenever I sit down, it squeaks.

I go up to her and say, “What’s your name?” “I’m Bowling Bonnie,” she says.

I get back in the car with my dad and we drive off. As we’re leaving, I say, “Wow, our house is really yellow.” “Yeah,” he says. “Either that or blue.” I’m just so confused I don’t respond.

“This one makes me look like a birdbath.” - yeah, this was me.

Then we go down to the stage, to see a Weezer concert. The van is still taking up half the stage, although we can’t figure out why, and on the other half of the stage is one guy with a bunch of instruments. He starts singing ‘Buddy Holly’ while playing all of the instruments at once, including a piano that makes guitar sounds. “I really thought there was more than one guy,” says SM.

…and this whole dream just made me laugh.

Someone has stolen something, although I’m not sure what. Luckily, they’ve also stolen a video camera. We figure out who it was by watching the video, which is about five minutes’ worth of tape of this person’s dog jumping up and down. The dog was absolutely my favorite part of this dream. It was so hairy it was almost round, and it was jumping straight up and down like a dog I used to know, and what with the roundness and the up-and-down it pretty much looked like a furry, bouncing ball. I don’t even think I was physically in this dream, but in my strange nonphysical state I remember laughing almost hysterically for a few minutes.

Hope that wasn’t too long.

[lucidboy]

Battle of the sexes 2: “Climbing Backwards” Challenge - 12/27/04
Then Eric went running laughing at me with a sudden
skirt on him and i asked him why he’s wearing a skirt and he answers me back " i do have a white
shirt"…

“The Gremlin” (L) - 01/16/05
I tried to transform my dog into an unicorn(not unigon) while being lucid.The dream faded before i could do that though.

Studying Cranberries musical notes - 02/11/05
I said to my asian teacher to shut up loudly, but then i had to forgive her by saying that i will have sex with her later on.

The Supermarket has weird ppl… - 04/26/05Then i was close to that area and this woman tells me
that March is the month of easter eggs and April the month of christ’s Resurrection.

David Blaine’s last trick - 05/01/05
I watched this video of me walking through the floor(my half body under
the floor and the upper body over the floor) but the later found that it was another trick of floor effect?

I had this notebook
which i was using to draw my “family” but Norbert my “brother” told me not to do that and instead he
was doing some weird enchant. Anyway then i had to rip off the page and throw it off but my “mother”
took it to see what i was drawing/writing but then she saw nothing and left it there.

A Beautiful Austin P. - 05/08/05
Apparenly Norbert’s enchanting lured “Austin Powers” disguised in some astronaut outfit. I
approached him and started drawing it… but then the dream ended.

DBZ isn’t for my grandmother - 06/20/05
My grandma watching Dragon Ball Z anime.

Kelly Clarkson’s gender change - 09/24/
I was Kelly in this dream, she(i) had penis instead of a vagina.

[worm]

The most funny of my dreams was that i saw a large alien ship on the sky, quickly run to the house, looked at the news paper and said:
-Uff…that ships here because the “independence day” is today in TV!

totaly stupid…

[Ithuriel]

In one of my dreams there was a suspended water slide made from large logs hung in a large forest. I remember racing down and up and all arond the forest on the muddy water slide. I remember having a great time, when I realised I was on this slide to catch up to this magic log that I dropped in it.
Weird but fun

[Lanina]

These aren’t so funny, but some of them are pretty wierd…

Max (I guy from school) sat by my window and told me that he had’nt eaten apples for a long time.

Me and Mattlo had a race, we had to get a tub filled with oil trough the forest as fast as possible, without spilling anything

I saw somekind of ad for a self-test. ‘Have you ever helped an ant? Did it feel helpful?’

I was playing Pokémon on GameBoy. It said “Chizzle me Nizzle” on the game cartridges

You could get high on a lot of things. A kind of peanuts, and by rubbing your thumb on a spade 9.

[Qu (aka pasQuale)]

USA and Australia have a Danone (Yogurt) war
USA buys a lot of Australian Danones so they can sell their USA made yogurt to Australia.

[HebrewB]

I remember having a dream where i was in bed asleep, i then woke up, saw there was nothing to do, so i went back to sleep. I also have extremely random dreams quite often, for example: I turned into a spring then bounced over gigantic mushrooms to heroically rescue a talking banana. WHAT THE HELL WAS I ON?

[char99bok]

My funniest dreams:

My grandparents adopt two twins, one is Japanese and one is black. The black one randomly changes genders all the time. My grandmother hates the Japanese one and always hits it repeatedly with a broom yelling, “This is for my boys!”

I had to write a report on the upcoming Senate election for Brazil. It was George W. Bush vs. Britney Spears. My teacher was Big Bird from Sesame Street.

[moogle (Kupo)]

Three monsters appear: they are going to fight me - but they will give me the power of my choice before the battle. (I don’t need power from them I’M LUCID!;p) they mention what powers I can choose … one is THE POWER TO OPEN LETTERS.

[Stormthunder]

Lol, char99bok and moogle! Especially the idea of Britney running against George Bush… I don’t know who would be more scary as the winner!

[Stormthunder]

Looking back through some of my older dreams, I rediscovered this paragraph I’d written and cracked up laughing at it, so I thought I’d post it here for you guys to have a giggle, too:

Later, I was called to an office somewhere in the building by, of all people, the driver of the black car that had brought me to the building. I went, and was promptly handed back the results of a test I didn’t remember doing. I didn’t do that well, but the reason for this, I saw, was because one-quarter of the marks allocated were for how well I seduced the old ugly driver! Thankfully, I had a big, fat zero in this column. Eager to get away from that weird man, I turned to leave and saw the awful party host again. He had a results paper too, and showed me on my way out. He’d failed overall, but to my horror I saw that in the “seducing the old man” column, he still had a score of three hundred and sixty! Bleurgh!

[blurvie]

I learned that “Fornicus” is the god of wet dreams. He is Cupid’s rival (or compliment) in that he makes you fall in to lust with people.

[Wolf]

@ Stormy and blurvie.

By Storm’s request…

Fuzzy Problems

[ND]Missy was laying on the bed in the master bedroom and rolled off with a thunk She got up on her two back paws and held up a wooden sign. With a rather nice voice for a cat, she said, “Are you fluffy like me? You might want to buy accident insurance from FluffCat.”

com[/com]

Out of this whole presentation, do you know what I found odd? The lettering on the board. How DID she get those letters so straight and perfect? Must have been done with stencils, with white paint. XD

She then left and Tigger jumped on the bed. Doing the exact same act, she rolled off with a plunk (she’s a big kitty =P) then got up and did the FluffCat thing. I laughed and told her that she wasn’t fluffy enough to do the commercial.

My mom, who had apparently been watching from the back, said she wanted Tigger to do it. What the freak?! She wasn’t fluffy at all! Tigs may be my little- er -big buddy, but the image of the scene was all wrong with her in it.[/ND]

Weeee… only I could miss a talking cat, yet notice the fancy lettering on a sign.

[Kenai]

“Not exactly funny, but weird” (arent all dreams…)

My Uncle: Man, youre goos at drinking wine.
Me: Yeah, shure, the thing is that i have never drunken wine.
My Uncle: Realy? O_o
Me: No…
My Uncle: Oh…*
silence
awakening

[chambered_nautilus]

Stormthunder suggested it, and I just couldn’t say no.

I notice some people who have cards with people’s pictures on them. They throw these cards on the ground and either spit or throw a drop of their blood on them, and the person comes sparkling out of the card to do whatever they’re needed for. It’s pretty cool, but not without its flaws, as I notice when someone’s dog eats one and suddenly grows enormously fat.

[Lanina]

Hahaha Poor card-person!

[chambered_nautilus]

Not to mention the poor dog!

[TAG_One]

My dream happened before I knew the term lucid dreaming, it was an “accidental” LD and the first LD where I took control of the dream.
I was searching for my brother outside amd I ended up outside some public toilets and saw a boy walk out of them so I thought “good maybe he will know where my brother is”. I walked up to him and saw that he wasn’t a boy, but a living mannequin. I suddenly realised that it had to be a dream and thought that, because it was a dream I might be able to control it. So I asked the mannequin if he knew where my brother was and thought to myself “he knows where my brother is” repeatedly. The mannequin answered yes to my question and walked off without showing me.
In the morning after I woke up this seemed pretty funny .

[Rodrigo]

Hey I decided to make this post seeming how odd dream humor can be. The most stupid, un-fun things seem to be hilarious in our dreams, as I have seen in mine and in some DJs.

So, post away! I will post directly from my DJ to start it:

NDOn the next page, there was a text before an “extras” section. The text was something like this: “Você pagou R$73 por esse livro. Podia ter sido mais caro se você tivesse comprado no eBay ou pré-comprado.”(English: “You paid R$73 for this book. It could have been more expensive if you bought it out of eBay or pre-buyed it.”) [com] Apparently, that was supposed to be funny. I seemed to find it funny in the dream, it was some sort of joke. Analysing that when woken, I figured my SC changed Amazon for eBay, and pre-order for pre-buy. Also, for americans, R$ refers to Brazil’s currency, the Real/com[/ND]

I merged your topic into the earlier one that was originally in the dream diary forum and moved it into stuff of dreams so it won’t disappear as fast again