Something lurking in the dark corners of my mind.

I’ve had lucid dreams for as long as I can remember. They come and they go. Sometimes they feel almost as real as waking life.

I’ve never been much for theories of psychic energies, dreamworlds or shared dreams. Others would brand me one of those anti spiritual people who are all about a ‘logical’ explanation.

Things change. I see more and more the flaw of my own thinking. I sit with my cereal bowl in the morning, more concerned with the day ahead of me than the fact that my mind just experienced days of events in a world beyond my comprehension. For although the experienced Lucid Dreamer will sometimes achieve dreams that distort time itelf, they somehow fail to give it credit. It was just a dream.

I am not insane. During the day my physical being locks me into the humanity that is my heritage. But at night I throw my mental fists against the walls of my subconcious.

I eat lunch with a friend. He tells me of a strange dream he had. I smile and I nod. I can’t shake my own dreams out of my head. I tell him of a burning village, houses like clay and stone with giant trees growing on their rooftops. I tell him of a girl dying in my arms, how alive she felt before she closed her eyes. I couldn’t save her, and the monsters who hurt her dissappeared forever. My friend shakes his head, he doesn’t understand. His looks at me like I’d been speaking a different language alltogether.

Why can’t we understand most of the time? Why is there a block there? It keeps so much out. What is its purpose?

Every night now for weeks I’ve been getting closer to something. I’m scared of what I’ll find.

Deep, man, deep…
I’d try interpreting and solving whatever it is in real life, then the dream will be better, with no block.

You should not be scared.

After all, the great chance is that you may find out something good. What if you have a talent, a capacity, or, if you believe this kind of stuff, a power?

You shouldn’t be scared of yourself or your SC. If something is hidden, the best you should do is continue to try and find out about it, solve it. In the end, I believe that you’ll at least learn something.

I’m also a logical type, though I like to keep an open mind.
You sound like you are afraid because your nightly experiences run more and more against your worldview. It’s normal to be uneasy about this, because your worldview e.g. tells you where you may be in danger, and where not. If you find that it’s flawed, this means there could be dangers where you never expected. If you run through the world not believing in psychic stuff, and you are suddenly aware you can read other people’s thoughts (just as an example, I don’t actually believe in psychic stuff, but my worldview may be flawed there of course :smile:), you’ll be scared anywhere you go, because you suddenly notice you could become victim to a psychic attack, and don’t know how to protect yourself.
Now this was just an example, but I hope it made my point. The best solution is to thoroughly question your old worldview in respect to the experiences which don’t fit, try to learn about the things you didn’t think possible until now, so you can prepare yourself and build a new worldview.
A rather more down-to-earth example, when I learned about black holes as a kid I was horrified. The idea that there may be things that suck you or the entire earth in and never give it free again was completely against what I believed at the time. However, I lost my feat when I learned more about this, and it was very relieving to find that we won’t be sucked into nothingness anytime soon, and today I’m perfectly happy with the idea of black holes because they are important to the way the world works. AFAIK, without a black hole in the center to hold it together, our galaxy would fly apart.

If you are confronted with things you don’t understand or don’t believe possible, it won’t help to stick your head in the sand and hope you’ll be left alone. Well, actually it will work most of the time, because if you lived without much harm with your old worldview chances are you’ll continue to do so. But if you try to understand and research what you’re experiencing, this might be an enlightening experience. If you learn something important the next nights, please let us know. At least I am very interested.

If your friend cannot relate to your experiences, maybe you can tell them a bit “adapted” to what’s comfortable to him, and don’t try to sound too concerned or mysterious or serious about it, this will scare people who don’t expect it from you. BTW that’s how your post sounds to me, mysterious and troubled.

MedO, I understand why you think I sound mysterious and troubled. I am definately troubled but I’m not trying to purposefully be mysterious.

I also know what you mean about adapting what I say to my friend. I can’t help but feel a little patronized. I’m no social missfit, dreaming has helped throughout the years to understand and relate to people, not the other way around.

I could tell my friend “Yea I had this crazy dream about[…]” but that would be a lie, because what he would understand from that might be acceptable to his mind and filter through his blocks but it would not be what I wanted to say.

Rodrigo, drumsticks, I usually approach things without fear in my dreams. However, I’ve thought seriously about what most people say dreams are. They are all in your head right? Every hill, city, dreamscape, they’re all generated by your mind. Beyond them, under them is your mind itself.

In my LDs I wield the power of my mind, I bend it under my will. It’s almost like two parts of my brain fighting. So I ask myself: If I win the war, what will I be?

Sorry about that. I don’t know your social skills, so I assumed nothing. :wink: