I have been trying to LD for months now. I check a watch and/or a hand mirror whenever I think I might be dreaming in waking life. I have had several dreams about dreaming (telling someone I dreamed something when on fact, it happened earlier in the dream, realizing “I’ve dreamed this before”) but never achieved control.
Last night, something important happened. I dreamed an ex-boyfriend and I took a sleeping draught that would activate conscious dreaming. It kicked in like a hallucinogenic drug, and everything started to sparkle. We walked around for a bit in a forrest until my dog ran along the trail. I picked her up and asked her which direction to go. She pointed left (which my dream dictionary tells me is significant of the unconscious) but we decided to go right. We got into various adventures, all symbols (stairs, drinking liquid, an my ex-boyfriend sewing something together with a thread) referencing the unconscious and attaining higher levels of consciousness.
Then a giant man with a hammer started attacking us. Suddenly, I stopped and said “this is a dream! I can control it!” I willed the giant to become confetti but he did not change. I was forced to violently smash his head in with his hammer, while wondering why, if I was lucid dreaming, I couldn’t control it. I forced myself awake. When I woke, I felt disturbed by the violence and my lack of control.
What went wrong?
