Alright so I just got into LDs about a week ago and have been trying this new FILD everyone’s raving about. I thought it would be good for me because I usually am able to go back to sleep after like 10 seconds of an alarm, regardless of what time it goes off. Ever since I started trying this method, that has not been the case. Even my dream recall has gone down horribly, like really really bad, worse than even before I had a DJ. I’ll just post what I typed in my journal (warning: quite vulgar. Most *** are the “f-word”, for your entertainment):
“God I’m so fucking pissed off. My entire life whenever my alarm goes off Im always able to go back to sleep within like 10 seconds. Now, when I’m trying to fucking make something of it, my alarm goes off and Im awake enough to fucking run the Boston fucking marathon. God I’m so pissed. I would like for this to work just fucking once. I finally make a dream journal, and now guess what, I can’t fucking remember any of my fucking dreams. I’m gonna stop trying and go back to how I used to do things. I mean for fucks sake brain will you please allow one, just one, thing to work out in my life. This pisses me off to unexplainable amounts. I can’t even remember a hint of a dream. I used to be able to do that every night. Its so fucking stupid. I’m just gonna take a break for a day maybe and see what happens. No alarms, no thinking, no reading, just let it happen. LIke what the fuck man. Im so goddamn awake right now and its 7:30 in the fucking morning. Literally take any morning from the past 7 years of my life at 7:30 and I would be more than willing and able to get right the fuck back to sleep, but no. Now, when I finally fucking try to make something of it, this happens. My brain has a miraculous fucking recovery and is ready to start the next Apple. Congratu-fucking-lations brain, you’re the fucking man. Whoopdy doo. Bitch.”
You made a change in your everyday or to better say your nightly routine and you expect that there will be no change only, except having LD’s? You are expecting to have LD’s but not expecting that something might become different/wrong/not as you imagined?
As you said you are into this lucid dreaming thing a week, don’t be discourage, don’t be angry, don’t rush things. Have in mind that every night you have a chance to achieve something, learn from your failures which I would call “unsuccessful tries” not failures. Creating this negative and angry image in your mind is what will become a general image of lucid dreaming in your mind and it’s your mind which will allow you to have or not to have lucid dreams.
Just enjoy the ride… Enjoy non lucid dreams as you might enjoy lucid ones…
