Can you change your personality in lucid dreams?

I admit that I tend to be a bit too “careful” and silent as a person in real life, and I don’t like that, and I was thinking that maybe lucid dreams could be used a sort of “training ground” where you can try out things that you want to socially improve on in real life?
If anything the freedom in lucid dreams should at least make you really happy and euphoric as a person, and this should make personality change much easier, right?

I’m talking about fairly dramatic changes here by the way, from silent and careful into social and talkative.
I used to be the latter several years ago as well, so I believe it’s “inside me” just waiting to rekindle again. :peek:

I don’t think that lucid dreams would give you a dramatic change, but it would help here. With them you can find why can’t you be more social and less silent.

But if you want a dramatic change go to a public place (IRL) and do some really crazy stuff, which you wouldn’t normaly do. It certainly would make a dramatic and fast change.

Oh, it’s certainly possible! I’ve used my dreams for that very purpose myself.
While I’m still an introvert (and I don’t think dreams will ever change that inner nature), I am not afraid to be social and outgoing when the situation calls for it. :cool:

[color=olive]Yea it should work if you allow it, but like Wyvern said I doubt it will change your inner nature. I out of the blue I tried being social for a bit and it was alright. After a while I just decided to go back to my corner.

SPOILER - Click to view

Solitude benefited me a lot more. I could detect bs and sense things easier… :eh: Probably since I was used to sensing or feeling nothing in solitude :shrug: Just my crazy little theory.

[color=olive]From experience I know that could be a good start depending on the place and time. Hopefully the people around are fun enough to understand or join in. Best of luck. :ok: [/color]

That’s nice to hear.
However, I don’t think I really am introverted by nature, because I used to be really social pretty often back in the school days, and I often wish I could spend more time with people without feeling uncomfortable sooner or later - and if I don’t feel content with this then I probably ain’t introverted either - or maybe I really am introverted and just wish I could be more spontaneous in general among people, I don’t know - but both my parents and my little brother are very extroverted, so, well…
Anyway, I was sort of thinking of trying to use lucid dreams to rekindle my social nature again, becuase my intuition tells me that I have that personality somewhere inside me - and lucid dreaming seems like an excellent platform to practice that side of myself.

If you think it is out there (and of course it is because it is in every human I think) than lucid dreams are an excellent choice for bringing it back. In lucid dreams you can find many pieces of your self which you supressed or rejected at certain part of your life because of certain reasons. Good luck finding it.

Nice question.

I think lucid dreaming could definitely initiate and foster change in the way you’re aiming for.

How you perceive yourself is pretty important. Being more careful and silent in social situations is a pretty important cycle to go thru, in my opinion, and since you had a more ‘opposite’ experience in your previous years, it only seems natural. Labelling cycles as ‘introverted’ and ‘extroverted’ can block your vision of who you truly are and what you’re truly up to. Personality is simply too rich, vast, and impermanent to contain in such concepts.

You could explore the purpose of acting more careful in social situation, in lucid dreams. Maybe you were hurt by someone and didn’t realize it? Maybe you’re looking for different kind of people to be your friends? The answer is in your mind, and I think lucid dreaminging could help in that way.

It seems to me that it would be a good place to rehearse socializing. Just as practicing in a mirror to learn to act or even socialize. I’m a shy person myself, so i might give that a try.

Absolutely. Well, to an extent. I had a long LD about a week ago, which has significantly improved my confidence and conflict resolution skills. I’m still super introverted, but still… looking forward to putting my new-found aggressive posture to work in my employment tribunal pre-hearing tomorrow. It’s definitely made me feel less easily intimidated. I do think it takes quite regular practice for the changes to stick, though. That, I’m still working on.

You keep using that word… I do not think it means what you think it means.

Introverted =/= Shy
Extroverted =/= Outgoing

One simply gains energy from being alone and gets drained from social situations.
And the other gains energy from being social and gets tired from being alone.

But an introvert can be very social and an extrovert may enjoy being alone. Just thought I’d clarify.

Good point.

I also think one limits themself when believing he/she ‘IS’ an introvert or ‘IS’ an extravert, that introversion and extroversion are like cycles or seasons in one’s experience; some days introversion is needed more to gather healthy energy and some days extraversion is needed more.

Oh well. It’s my personality and I’ll generalise if I want to :smile:

I imagined that being sung like the Lesley Gore song, haha

Heh :wink:

It was.

[color=olive]That explains why I couldn’t stand being out in the open and wishing that the campus was empty. :bored: I would litterally feel drained or irritated in the presence of a bunch other people after being alone for a while. Guess its introvert season. :read: [/color]

Can you clarify what you mean by this? In my experience of people, they are generally one or the other, though in different positions on a spectrum, I’d say. Ex. A very introverted person, a very extroverted person, someone around the middle.

I see ideas like introversion/extraversion—and all the lil characteristics that attach to the idea— getting in the way of genuine self-realization. I feel true understanding of one’s self and others comes from a more ‘thoughtless’ or ‘mindful’ awareness. The less thoughts, prejudices, assumptions, etc. one has, then the more open one can be with who they’re observing. The more open they are, then the deeper they can understand.

The deeper one can understand themself, the more aware they become of their own potential, strengths, and abilities. The more aware they become, the more possibilities are available to them.

Well, I don’t find all labels limiting. And I certainly think labels are flexible and can be changed. They are merely ways we organize our lives and help us understand eachother, not only ourselves.
I’m reminded of the composer Claude Debussy who composed in the Impressionistic style. He preferred not to label his music by this term. I don’t think he had a label at all. He was somewhat of a hipster, you can say. :razz:
Wiki definition: Musical impressionism focuses on a suggestion and an atmosphere rather than on a strong emotion or the depiction of a story as in program music
What does Debussy do? He composes music of his impression and feelings of dreams, oceans, storms, etc. He and Ravel are the examples we use today to understand that Impressionistic music.
You can choose to not apply a label to yourself, fine. But doesn’t mean you won’t inevitably fall into one.

Now, the point I wanted you to clarify was this specifically:

For the sake of staying on topic, as someone who practices lucid living, I am accustomed to the personality traits being pulled over from the dream life into waking life and vice versa. Given that this is possible, we can look at past dreams and examine the many roles and personas we may have taken in them. All of these would theoretically be accessible.
So, it may not necessarily be a ‘change’ in overall personality but an expansion of it. But I suppose it would be a change in what is accessible to us in WL, and the possibilities for this could be endless.

I’m not sure I agree here. This sounds like the words of somebody who could be called an ambivert. This means somebody who rides the line between introvert and extrovert, never fitting exactly into either category. Personally I’m strongly introverted.

I’d agree that entirely isolating yourself is not the best way to go, but that doesn’t change the fact that social situations will always deplete my energy over time. That without significant time alone and to myself I will become very stressed and unhappy. It’s not an issue of confidence for me, I work as a manager in retail and am comfortable dealing with everything from staff to obnoxious complaining customers. It’s just that being around people doesn’t ‘give me energy’ being alone in solitude does. Given the choice between a quiet walk alone in a forest, or a lively party, there is absolutely no doubt which I prefer. One sounds like a wonderful experience, the other sounds like a wasted and draining night. I also know others who talk about being alone in exactly the same ways that I feel about being with people. It’s not a limitation, it’s part of our ‘true identities’ if such a thing exists. Whether I’m labelled an introvert, an extrovert or a flying monkey. It won’t change how I feel about being around people. It’s something to be done and enjoyed in moderation.

It’s not just about how much you enjoy being around people, but also involves how you like to interact with them. I have zero, even negative interest in socializing when that means talking for the sake of talking for example. I seek deeper more meaningful connections to people I respect, I’d prefer to be entirely alone than with people who feel shallow, by a very large margin. I do have to admit that I tend not to seek contact with people as often as I probably should, because I don’t feel a compulsion to do so. I don’t suffer for being alone. That can mean missing out on getting to know some cool people or making them think I want to be left alone / don’t want to talk to them, but I’m getting off topic here.

Coming back to the topic a bit, it depends a lot on why you are feeling unsocial. There can be many reasons and it doesn’t have to be introversion. If you are scared of people in some way (and many many people are, I think most people have some level of agoraphobia at some time in their life.) then you will get tense being around people, which will have the effect of draining you and making you feel very uncomfortable and afraid to act. It’s different to being introverted, it’s being paralysed by fear. If that’s the case then I can definitely see lucid dreaming being useful in dispelling that fear. In that case though, it’s not strictly changing your personality, as much as releasing fears so you can act more naturally.

I once did an improvised version of peter kay’s sequence to the song Amarillo in the middle of a club filled with mostly people aged 40-75, who played the song only because they were from that era and liked it. It didn’t change my personality. I wasn’t drunk and I was the only one doing it. Another person tried to start, but didn’t know the sequence very well. It was something I would never normally do and I did just to see how it would feel, for a laugh and to see if I could actually do it. I’ve always been ‘shy’ such a public performance is dramatically out of character.